Tender Mercies

During these past few months I've received many, many blessings. I sometimes get scared for the weeks and months to come, remembering what has happened helps me to continue forward in faith. The Lord has taken care of me thus far, why would it change? A few weeks ago I saw the newish (to me) video of Elijah and the widow. (On the O.T. supplemental videos; see if it you haven't.) I've read, heard, told this story all my life, but seeing it right now at this time really impacted me. I've now watched it several times. It's a lot more meaningful when I feel like my own cruse of oil is running quite low. And thinking about it is part of what has prompted the reflection on all the blessings that have continued to pour out for me.

Here are just a few blessings and tender mercies that I've experienced in the past while.

1. The timing with my car. I wrote about this last post, but I still am in awe at the perfectness of it.

2. For the past several years I have lived out of a suitcase for way too many periods. Moving across country with a month lag time, internships, etc. Always, by the end I am feeling super anxious to have my own space again. My own kitchen, to cook my own meals. My own room. My clothes and belongings unpacked. The anxiousness gets worse and worse, sometimes resulting in tears or super stress headaches. I can't explain, though you may understand if you've been there. It's just good to have a home--even if it's just a little dorm space.

A few days ago, as I repacked my bags for about the 20th time (NO exaggeration), I started thinking about that. I have now been without a house of my own for 3 months and 9 days--with no end in sight, really. And I don't remember feeling that anxiousness at all. When I made this realization I stopped to really analyzing, thinking that maybe I didn't remember it today, but surely at some point I had felt it. But no, I can't remember any such moment. Want a job, yes? But no anxiousness for my own space. And I can only credit that, absolutely, 100% to the Lord helping me, giving me the Spirit to help with that particular, important thing.

3. When I first got laid off I made this comment in my blog, "So, it turns out that I should have focused on the food storage instead of the 72-hour survival kit." That's what I thought, too. Turns out, I kind of did. My natural way of living, influenced by my mother intentional living as well as the fact that we lived far from stores, means that I always keep things on hand. So, as I'd built up some food base for my apartment in the 2.5 months that I was employed, I had really acquired something. And that something stretched and stretched. If I had stayed in my own apartment, it would have gone for a long time. As it was, I still had plenty through the months. I gave away food, have food still (in storage), and kept having to move food, because it just didn't disappear. Part of this was made possible by the many people who fed me. But there also just seemed to be food, food, food available.

When I came home (to my parents), I brought the last of my freezer and on-hand items--still one large bag and a crate-full. Since this was the 3rd time in 4 months that I'd come home, each time bringing a random assortment of food, Benson asked me why I always brought home food. Now, I'd thought about it and discussed it before, but it was as I answered him that it really hit home. I brought home food because the Lord has "open[ed]...the windows of heaven and pour[ed me] out a blessing," but not ending there, blessings so great "that there [was] not ... room enough to receive it." Literally.


And so, I return where I started, the Lord has blessed me so specifically, so completely (often through others, also through the Spirit), why would I not keep trusting him?