Sadly, there are not pictures of Vermont in the fall. It was gorgeous. Gorgeous in the early, bright fall; gorgeous in the middle, rich fall; gorgeous in the duller, late fall (I actually think that might have been my favorite). I loved this fall. It was a nice long one. But I didn't bike much and I didn't take many pictures. (Minus the hike to Camel's hump--maybe I'll post those later.) So I just thought about this when I went to check when I last blogged. (Which was so long ago it was still summer. and we had 3 months of fall.)
Anyway, that's not what I got on to blog about. I am going to try to be more electronically active, so I'm starting with what I'm familiar with--blogging. (But I'm also planning to start using FB more, so stay tuned for that.) This post is both a topic that's been on my mind, so a good place to (re)start, but also an explanation (part one of an explanation) about why I'm even doing this.
Back in August, my friend Avinash called to tell me he and Aimee were getting married (finally!!!) and to invite me to their wedding, in Utah (where she is from). Initially I didn't think I would go (I don't usually fly to weddings, unless they're my siblings'--this is the 3rd in 15+ years), but then I realized I could see my baby Benson, who would be home from his mission by the wedding date (end of Sept). And Hyrum, who I hadn't seen since Christmas. And Rachel. So I bought tickets and went.
It was the most incredible, lovely trip. I was there for about 5 days. I spent 3 days in Provo, two half days in Bountiful, and a day+ in Logan. By the time I got home, I was so hoarse I could hardly talk. I spent loads of quality time with Benson (we went to classes, went to find out about preapprovals at my favoriteist credit union, went to hang out on Provo River, ate too much, stayed up until the wee hours playing Rummikub with Aline (good thing there was a curfew; and oh it was fun times on memory lane), had early morning scripture study, and just enjoyed being together. Stayed up until SUPER late visiting with Christina, newly returned missionary cousin (such good, good conversation--man, I miss that). I spent a great day at wedding events--good memories, beautiful things, lots of Boston friends, and tons of fun, fun time with Aline. I squeezed in time with Carrie (freshman friend, Spanish house roommate); got to hold her sweet, sweet newborn. I went to the wonderful Women's Meeting with mission companion/later roommate Sarah; also stayed overnight/visited with her. Went to church with cousins Johanna and Beth, then visited more with them. Super fun visit with Geovanni and family (my MTC teaching companion and his dear wife and girls who I became good friends with). Had a fabulous, guiding conversation with Aunt Ruth Elaine (on day one) and then enjoyed a fun Sunday with the "whole" family on Sunday. And then good, good times with the Logan crew (Rachel, Ryan, Hyrum). Besides tons of visiting, I went to Rachel's class and got to spend a day in Spanish immersion with her cute kiddos. And then went to campus and class with Hyrum. Fabulous meal and family home evening with all of them.*
I was richly fed by the Spirit from all of our conversations. I learned intellectual things. I heard new ides and was able to learn from sharing things myself. I loved speaking Spanish, sharing so much scriptural-based truth, and just understanding/being understood.
But most of all--I was loved. Loved.. Loved. Bathed in love. Physical and emotional love surrounded me. Incredible people from SO many different times of my life. Really, they represented every significant part of my life. And I was reminded that I have been truly loved. It felt so incredibly wonderful. I just can't explain how good it was.
The only bad part was that when I came home, life was even more difficult than usual. Really, really rough, actually. October should be a happy month. But it was hard. We'll get to that more, but it needs said here.
I had a brief, super fun reprieve when Deanna and her family came to visit. !!! So fun. We had a lovely autumn day together enjoying the pleasures of Vermont. :) And once again, I was loved by a dear friend the Lord put in my life long ago (as well as her fun children).
I also soaked in general and stake conferences. Perhaps there will be more about that in part two. But for now, I'm ending.
Long story short, I remembered what it felt like to be loved. And it was so good. :)
*I would like to say that even though I was exhausted by the time I got home, I was incredibly blessed not to get sick.
3 comments:
It is heartwarming to hear about your wonderful visit to Utah but hard to hear that you struggled upon returning back to Vermont :( I miss you friend.
Ditto to what Sara said! I hope you get more visitors and get to make more visits during the holidays. And one of these days we will get together, I just know it! =)
I can very much relate to putting up a fence around your heart and choosing not to love anymore. It's a shame that happens with age, that you get hardened and bitter when people reject your friendship. I feel happiest when I choose to love even if I'm not loved in return. I'm so glad we got to see you, I wish we could have talked more. It's hard for me to relax and be myself sometimes when there is so much chaos. And, though fun, that trip was a bit chaotic :) This reminds me of when you came almost exactly 2 years ago to help me with the children right after Zeke was born. I felt so loved by you! It was one of the nicest things anyone has done for me! And, you made me feel SO loved. It's such a nice feeling to be loved by someone who knew you at a different stage in your life. As a fresh out of high school 18 yr old. I hope you know how very much I love you and I always will, no matter what :)
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